【エッセイ＃14】優しくない世界にあなたは優しい人になれ（JPN/ENG）

優しくない世界にあなたは優しい人になれ

The world is kind to those who are being kind

文字数　3,392字

「『冷たい人』は彼らが優しさを知らないより、スイッチがあるように、便利に相手によるとその優しさを付けたり消したりできて、機械か人間かわからない意味です」

こんにちは、アップしたときはもうすぐ春本番ですね！

Hi everyone! Well, I think that the spring is coming by the time I post this essay!

寒さがちょっと苦手なので、少し暖かくなるのは嬉しいです（笑）

As for myself who does not like the cold much, I’m glad that it gets a bit warmer now…!

はい、今回の話題はタイトル通りでなぜ私たちはもう少し優しくなる方がいいのかですが、内容は少し蛇行します。

In this time, the essay is following what I wrote in the title which I wish we should be kinder to other people, although it may not be so simplistic as anyone might have expected.

『善悪』は『善』がよく弱い方で、人が従わなければ苦虫を嚙み潰したようなことみたいですが、実は『悪』より強いです。

Even if in “good and evil”, the good seems to be on the weaker side, and that people have to suffer in order to do the right thing, I should say that in fact “goodness” is actually the stronger side.

まず、みなさんは「見た目で人を判断したらだめ」というのはよく聞ききますよね。しかし、優しくするのはみんなに等しくいいことをする意味ならば、嫌だし、くだらなさそうな人も含まれるそれは、でも自分と言えば『可動慈善団体』ではなく、いいことをするなら勝ち組の人へのみだろうなと思うのはだれでもかもしれません。

First of all, we must have heard the saying that “we should not judge people by appearances.” However, if what it means by being kind is that we treat everyone equally, which includes those who seem unpleasant or unworthy of our attention, and yet we do not want to turn ourselves into a “mobile charity organization,” so perhaps we all came to the conclusion that it would be better if we just do good things only to people whom we deem worthy enough.

ですが、キーワードはここです。自分はだれかに優しくして利益になると『知っている』と言うことは、本当に私たちは正確を知っていますか？

Still, the keyword is here. When we say we “know” who would not waste our time and is probably beneficial for us to behave nicely to, do we really know for sure who they are?

？

次いで、自分は『勝ち組』だと知っているのは見た目がいい人、仕事ができる偉い人かもしれません。だから私たちは彼らに注目を浴びさせるのは社会の風景なのです。

Reasonably, those we think we know they are “worthy” are the said handsome or beautiful people or someone in respectable occupations earning high figures, and thus what we are seeing nowadays that they are the most attractive demographic group in our society.

ところが、現実だと見ると、例えば有名人などそれは、私たちは彼らにどのくらい好意が溢れるコメントなどを送っても、たまに彼らは優しく返すかもしれませんが、それはそれだけではないですか。「まあ、アイドルの握手会で好きなアイドルが笑顔をくれたんだ！ひどい世界でせめて俺は優しくしてあげる人、正しい人だ」と感じますが、ちゃんと考えたら、そのコメントや笑顔は、社会のだれでもくれるのではないですか。

Nevertheless, in reality, for example such as with the famous people, no matter how much well-meaning comment full of love and care we post, even though sometimes they might reply back, isn’t it all we get in return? And we might feel something like, “well, at an idol group’s fan meeting (a handshake event), the idol I like even gave me a really nice smile! so even though this world is nasty, at least I chose the right person that I should open my heart to.” But when we think carefully, aren’t those comments and smiles something that anyone in this society is capable of giving us?

？？

偉い人の場合なら、非常に丁寧な態度を取るのは私たちの自動的な反応ですが、彼らの雰囲気や少しのやり取りで感動する機会で、「自分の周りのくだらない人より彼らにいいことをするのが正解だ」と感じても、何度彼らのお陰で、彼らは具体的に私たちの人生の何かを変えられますか。

In case of the rich or high-ranking people, although we are likely to behave respectfully to the point of being obsequious around them as if it is natural for us, so that when we have a chance to be close to feeling their venerable aura or talk with them a little bit, we might think “yeah, I am right in doing good things to them instead of these worthless people around me,” and yet how many times because of their favor that our lives have changed in any way substantial?

？？？

ならば、私たちは誰かが利益になるという鋭いセンスがあると信じるのは、実際にあまりどうりではないし、大体『確証バイアス』ということではないかと。

In that case, what we believe that we have a keen sense of knowing who might be beneficial for us, in fact it is not much so, and perhaps for most of the times isn’t that just what we call “confirmation bias”?

この社会の中にいるのは気づかないかもしれませんが、外から見たら私たちがあるパーティーにいるようで、ケーキのようなもの好意を好きな人に投げるそこは、お互いの頭を越えて少数派の参加者へ投げながら、パーティーにケーキが足りないとクレームをして、確かにとても珍しい風景です。

We who are in the middle of this society may not realize, but when looking from afar it is as if we are living in a certain kind of party that within such party, above everyone else’s head we keep throwing pieces of cake we have toward the minority of participants as a token of our good feeling, while claiming that the cake is not enough for the whole party, which of course is a very much quaint sight.

そう私たちの『いい気持ち』が届かないと知っていても、まだ偉い人への年賀状などを念入りに作るし、イケメンや美人に優しいコメントを送るのは宝くじを買うように当たらないはずだとわかっても、当たるためにいつも私たちは挑戦し続けるのかもしれません。

Even if we know that our “good feelings” might not reach them, and we may also be aware that by carefully making New Year’s greeting cards for high-ranking people or send a well-meaning message to good-looking guys or girls it is almost no different from buying a lottery ticket that it would never hit any prize, but perhaps we just keep trying in hope that it might hit the jackpot someday.

お金持ちではない、くだらない人たちには優しいことをしたらガチョウと黄金の卵になってある日彼らは私たちを助けてくると言いたくないです。利益などより付き合ったらただ普通の会話しかできないかもしれませんが、逆に偉い人や見た目のよい人などを追いかける私たちは少し鏡を見たらどうでしょうか。

I would not say that if we are being kind to those who have average income or someone who looks like they are not in a position to return any favor, it would become like the story of the Goose that Laid the Golden Eggs that one day they might unexpectedly be of some help. And instead of the relationship becoming beneficial, it might be just some extra conversation if you spend time with people out there, but on the other hand, shouldn’t we who keep chasing after the all sorts of worthy people look in the mirror for a moment?

例えば自分に子どもがいたら、彼らにいい人になるよう、優しい人になろうねといつも教えているのが、その間自分は何かのモンスターになって、相手が平凡な人だと見れば嫌な気持ちだし、外科医のブログだとわかったら優しいコメントを浴びさせて（カクヨムで本当に見ました）、子どもが自分を真似るのが時間の問題ではないかと。

For example if you have children, even though you always teach them to be good and kind to other people, meanwhile as you yourself have become somewhat of a “monster”, that when others appear to be of mediocrity you feel like wanting to keep distance, and when knowing that a certain blog is the blog of some surgeon you flood it with comments full of love and care (I have really seen this happen on the novel website Kakuyomu), I guess that it should be only a matter of time before your children imitate this behavior of yours.

しかし、冒頭で言ったいいことが『寄付』ではなし『強い方』はこれです。

However, what I said in the beginning that by doing good things it does not mean you have to do “charity” and goodness by itself is “strong” is this.

現実に考えたら、みんなへ怪しげな目で見て、相手が好きな人や偉い人だとわかったら温かい人に豹変するのは自分で気づかないかもしれませんが、他人からの視点で見ると、そういう『信用できる人たち』が現れるまで私たちはいつもビビって、常に何かを避けるようでは？

When we consider the reality that when we, who suspect everything and everyone around us, meet someone we like or the respectable people and then we turn all the sudden into a kindhearted person, which even though we ourselves may not realize, but upon looking from other people’s point of view, until those “trustworthy people” appear, don’t we look someone who is trying to avoid everything as if making sure we look nonexistent?

私たちはそういう人を見かけたら、「この人はいつも溝から覗くみたいし、車とか通ったらいつでも溝に逃げるような態度は魅力だ」とは思わないでしょうし、漫画、アニメ、小説などの作品は大体女の主人公が溝に出没する性格より、男の主人公と対照的に陽気だし、他人へ向かう性格は内向的な社会でもまだ人気という意味ではありませんか。

When we see such person, it is unlikely that we would think “right, this person always behave like they are hiding in the gutter peeking from there, and whenever something like a car passes by they always seem ready to get back into the gutter - Wow! This is such an appealing character!” and in fictional works such as manga, anime, or novel, instead of the female protagonists having the personality like that they are fond of being around the gutter, most of them are cheerful and care for other people in contrast to the male protagonists’ characteristics, and doesn’t it mean that such personality being seen as agreeable even in the introvert society?

追加したいですが、『冷たい人』は彼らが優しさを知らないより、スイッチがあるように、便利に相手によるとその優しさを付けたり消したりできて、機械か人間かわからないという意味です。

And I would like to add that what is meant by a “coldhearted person” is not that they do not know kindness, but that they could turn such kindness on and off as if there is a switch depending on who the other is, to the point that we do not know whether they are machine or human anymore.

 結局自分は一番安全だし最適な戦略、相手は価値があると思ったら起動するのは、自分の一番敵になります。

In the end, the safest and most reliable strategy for us that we would make a move only when we think others are worthy enough, would also backfire us the greatly.

従って、自分は普通に人に優しいのは、どれくらい魅力的になるのか少し考えてほしいです。多分周りの人は普段優しいことなどを抱かなくても、この人の存在を見れば自分も優しくするかもしれなません。それがお金などの話にならなくても、せめて何でも避ける、運命の人などの出会う日まで待つ自分より、もっと優しい日々とあうと思いませんか。

Accordingly, I would like you to imagine that how much pleasing your character might become if you are someone who is normally being kind to other people. Even if those around you may not be so kind in your daily life, perhaps by seeing how you are being nice they might also want to be kind to you. And although that might not turn into monetary gain or anything, don’t you think that you would find kindness in life more than the people who just keep waiting to know someone who might be of any use to them?

みなさんは「不幸は不幸を引く」みたいな表現を聞いたことがあるかもしれませんが、そう人が偉い人かどうか選ばない視点に生きれば、気づかないうちにその性格の魅力が偉い人の目を惹かれる可能性もあるようです。それに、そういう運がなくても（狙っても成功する可能性がほとんどないと考えたら）日々がもっと晴れるのではないですか。

You may have heard of the saying “unhappiness attracts unhappiness” and the like, that likewise if a person live with an attitude that does not discriminate who may or who may not benefit them, there is a possibility that the charm in their character might unintentionally end up attracting those in the higher positions who really can help them. Besides, even if you do not have such luck (although the chance is almost none to begin with even if you aimed for it) don’t you think there should be a slightly brighter side to your life?

馬の目を抜くと規則にする社会に自分がずるい、ほかの人より早いと思うのは一般的で、いいことをしたら現実に着かないし、犠牲者になるばかりという考え方があるあるらしいですね。

I think it is somewhat common in our society to believe that we should outwit each other and even resort to dirty tactics in order to get what we want. And also we seem to suppose that it is not feasible for us to be nice and kind, because by doing such we would only fall victim to other people.

ですが、悪いことをしたら実際にその『実用的な原則』を実行する結果を見るとどうでしょうか。

However, would you like to stop for a while and see how such “practical principle” works in reality?

そういう風景は漫画などの殺し合いゲームの作品のようにずるをしないと生きられないと私たちは信じるかもしれませんがが、結局そう信じるのは『みんな』ではないですか。

Although the situation is similar to the death games being portrayed in manga stories that we should be cunning and kill each other in order to survive, in the end isn’t it just about “everyone” who has such thought?

そう信じてもお金持ちにならないし、平凡な人として私たちと肩を並べて共存する人がほとんどです。彼らはまだ利益がある人を探す信念を抱いて、同僚と家族にも社会には馬が馬の目を抜くよねと言って、そして狙った通りに何も成功しなくても死ぬまで『早い』と『ずるい』しか考えないのではないですか。

Those who hold such belief but is yet to become rich and live side by side in the society without any particular difference from us, are almost everybody. Perhaps they might still cling on to the conviction that they should still go find someone beneficial to them, keep talking to the coworkers and family members that they need to be quick-witted and cheat in all possible ways so that they can live in this harsh society, and that even though they do not succeed in anything so far, they would still continue thinking about how to be “cunning” and that they should “outwit others” to their deathbed.

そう言っても、『彼ら』というより『私たち』のことかもしれません。

That being said, when I used the word them it is probably not about “them”, but actually “us”.

『優しさ』は甘いし、現実に着かないと裏で思って、『ずるい』のが優秀と思う私たちは、その信仰で今まで何に勝っていましたか？

And as for we who believe to ourselves that “kindness” is inane and not practical, and that to be “cunning” is the universal rule, have we won anything so far with such way of thinking?

ずるをして成功する方がいますが、『ずる』は名門大学の入学ように一桁の割合くらい応募者を受けます。再試験がないようそれは、一旦断れて、30、40代まで何も変わらずに生きていて自分はまだ『善悪』の分岐路にいるとより、『悪』の道は長く閉じて、『善』にしか生きられないです。

There might be people who are cunning and become successful in what they wish for, and yet being “cunning” is similar to an admission to a famous university that admits only a single-digit percentage of applicants. In such university there is no second or third entrance examination, so that if you get rejected and live to your 30s or 40s without anything in your life changed in particular, instead of seeing yourself as standing on the crossroads between “good” and “evil”, the “evil” path has already been closed to you, and that there is no other way for you except to live in “goodness”.

なので、『優しさ』とは何、という質問があるかもしれません。

Then, there may be a question of what “kindness” is.

アニメで主人公が優しいと描写したいならいつもおばあちゃんが道を渡るのを助けるシーンを入れたし、私たちならそれは寄付するしボランティアになって具体的な行動だと考えますが、この点で、私たちは話題を変えて『愛』と言う定義が何か少し考えてほしいです。

While in anime, whenever there is the need to portray the main character’s kindness, it has always been the scene that they kindly help an elderly woman crossing the street, as for us we might have an idea that kindness is a concrete action such as by donating or volunteering in something, but here I would like you to think about this related matter of how we might define what we call “love”.

愛がある方は好きな人に色んなことをしてあげたいですが、強いて聞いたらプレゼントをあげること自体が愛か、一緒によく時間を過ごすのが愛か、メッセージを送るのが愛か、身体関係もそれですか、そして言ったすべての行動をする人は愛しているという意味か。

Even though those who are in love may wish to do a lot of good things for their lovers, we could also ask that is the act of giving gifts the love itself? Does it mean love by just often being together? Is texting occasionally something we could call love too? Or is physical intimacy also one of such things? And then does it mean that the person who does all the actions mentioned should be called someone in love?

むしろ、行動より、愛は具体的な気持ちだろうか。

Rather, instead of it being an action, perhaps love is more of emotions.

確かに人はすべての行動をできても、愛がないことがありますし、すべて優しいと言われることができても、優しさがないこともあります。

It’s of course that even if we could do all the things above it does not always mean that it is love. Similarly, for those who could do all things that are regarded as acts of kindness, it is possible for them not to have such kindness at all.

しかも人が優しいなら、自分は何をしたら優しく見えるかと思うことはしないと思います。

Moreover, if a person is kindhearted, I think that they would not ask what they should do in order to be looked upon as such.

最後に、もしみなさんが私と同じなら、普段外で大体の人を避けるし、知らないふりをしているし、何でも関係ないようにして、家に着いたらヒーターのおかげか家族と恋人などを温かくして、「私は冷たい人じゃない、優しい人だよ、見て見て」と思って、自分は冷たい人かどうかはなくなります。でもちゃんと考えたら、身内からほかの厳選された人たちしか温かい気持ちを見せたくないのは殺人犯に限らず、すべての犯罪者もそうで、彼らも自分が温かい人と思うかもしれません。

And lastly, If you are the same as myself, whenever I go outside I would normally avoid most of the people, pretend that I do not know them, or make sure that I would never come into contact with them. But then when I arrive home, probably because of the warmth of the heater that I become more softened towards family members or a lover, and could not help thinking “Here, I am not a cold person, I am so very kind! Look at me!” and then the suspicion that I might be a coldhearted person would have gone. Nonetheless when thinking carefully, I guess that every criminal including murderers also normally shows the warm side of their personalities only toward their relatives or some individuals they decided are worthy enough, and probably they would all think that they themselves are kindhearted too.

もしこれが優しさの定義なら、我が国には優しい人が溢れると思います。

If this is the definition of kindness, I think that it should be no surprise that our country is teeming with kindhearted people as it is.

――――――――――――

おまけ

このブログのプロフィール写真、昨日改めて鉛筆で描きました！色が何か褪せていると思いますが>_<ドローイングが趣味で漫画風が好きですが、いつも描いたらこういう風な絵になってしまいます…（最初もっと漫画っぽく描こうとしました　笑）

こう私はこのエッセイ（とほかのエッセイ）を書いても、そこまでの信仰がないと思います。

私は何かを信じるより、人とほかのことを観察する方が好きで、書いたのは見たことのままです。

そういうことをよく周りの人に言って、なぜどこかに記録しないのとおすすめされたので、このブログを始めました。

実はいつも憂鬱な私は、ほしいことがあまりないし、こう書いたのは何の用があるかはまだわかりませんが、強いて考えたらせめて葬式でエッセイを本にして参列者にあげられるのではないかと……

冗談ですが（￣ー￣？）こういう風にブログを続けています^^